Alef: The NEXT Conversation
Give Me Crabs On My Wedding Day
By Lauren E.
I love crabs. Get your head out of the gutter. I mean the cute, crawly, Sebastian-esque singing crabs. Growing up in Maryland, I learned to have pride in our Maryland crabs, mastered the art of eating crabs at an early age, and personified them as my make-believe friends at an annual picnic of mostly-Jewish lawyers from a prominent Baltimore law firm.
Now I’m getting married and what better way to welcome my out-of-town guests than with a good ol’- fashioned Maryland crab feast? Just one problem. One of the “benefactors” of the wedding says “NO” to crabs at a Jewish wedding. I won’t bore you with all of my family and future-family treyf stories. The bottom line is, it’s a big fat NO.
I’m a bit disappointed.
Beer + crabs = a great way to begin a life of commitment to my best friend and soul mate. But if this is the biggest disagreement we have throwing together a wedding, then so be it!
Click here to read more about our “Why I Eat What I Eat” series.
Thumbnail photo courtesy of Williams and Sonoma, licensed under Creative Commons
A Love-Hate Relationship with Food
By Rella K.
I have a love-hate relationship with food.
I don’t think most of my friends know there is a “hate” side to my relationship with food. I’m an avid food blogger. I’m always trying new dishes, new foods, new ingredients. I’ll frequently spend an entire Sunday just cooking and baking, and then a host 5-course dinner party.
I grew up in a community that put an incredible amount of stress on being thin. Everyone I knew was on a diet; some were pretty ordinary like limiting fat intake and eating lots of fruits and vegetables. Some were pretty ridiculous like eating nothing other than rice cakes for an entire 8-hour day of school. And then there were the dangerous eating habits—the severe limitations on food intake, and the throwing up in the bathroom after lunch. [And by the way, this all started in middle school].
When I was in the tenth grade one of my classmates spent a summer in a clinic being treated for an eating disorder. I think she was lucky—at least her parents were willing to admit to her problem. For so many other girls I knew, disordered eating patterns were just par for the course. Because really, if you weren’t a size 2 nobody would want to marry you (or at least that’s the message we got).
I’m not going to lie; I thought about following in the footsteps of those around me. I was overweight throughout most of high school, perhaps unconsciously trying to counteract what I was seeing around me with all the restrictions people put on their own appetites. Objectively I knew (and know) that skipping meals or throwing up is bad, and I never did it, but it didn’t stop me from thinking that maybe that had it right. Luckily college was a breath of fresh air, and I think the reduced stress contributed to my dropping a significant number of pounds I had been unable to shed for years before.
Hence, my love-hate relationship with food. Truth be told, the love wins out most of the time (luckily). I receive immense pleasure from writing and photographing for my food blog; I love when my friends call me their “recipe guru;” and I find that after a stressful day at work, whipping up a batch of sumptuous chocolate chip banana nut muffins is relaxing, even cathartic.
Still, I sometimes get an inkling in the back of my mind after I have a meal I know is high in calories and fat. Don’t get me wrong, I eat in a very healthy manner, and I cook for myself a lot so I know exactly what goes into things. But I eat out at restaurants, and I have meals at friend’s houses, and as much as I hate it, I think about every bite I put in my mouth.
Do I wish I didn’t obsess about food so much? Maybe. But I wonder if my obsession ultimately led me to discover how passionate I am about food, cooking, and blogging about it. Sure, I’d prefer I hadn’t grown up in such a toxic environment, but I’m a firm believer that our experiences shape who we are. And I’m happy with who I am today.
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Image provided by Dan4th, licensed under Creative Commons.
Click here to read more from our “Why I Eat What I Eat” series.
The Hostest With The Mostest (Hummus)
There’re few things that make Alef happier than good food. That’s why we were pretty bummed we weren’t invited to this NEXT Shabbat meal in LA. While we’re not sure the hostess’ estimate of “85 tons of pita” is a totally trustworthy description of her Shabbat menu, our mouths were watering at the rest of her Shabbat spread. Don’t believe us? Tuck in your bib, this Shabbat meal is drool-worthy:
The Hostess With the Mostest (Hummus)
I like having guests over. Blame it on my mother – after all, she is Martha Jewart. Ever since I was a kid I was raised knowing that there are very specific ways to throw a party. She has very strict rules about how dishes are arranged, what we’re allowed to serve, how food is displayed, etc. When I was little I thought that was ridiculous. “Show me the guest who gives a shit if I put the ketchup bottle on the table without first scooping it into a crystal bowl!” I would scream.
Of course, now I’ve inherited that behavior. So when it came time to throw a special Shabbat dinner for a group of my friends last weekend, you know I went to town…
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Click here to read more from our “Why I Eat What I Eat” series.
Eat With Eli
Hazon changed all that. My life took a fortuitous spin when I (along with my parents, whose lives have also been drastically changed – they’ve since started an organic farm), attended the 2007 Hazon Food Conference at the Isabella Freedman Jewish Retreat Center. This was the year they famously shechted goats. And it was also the year I discovered other 20-somethings who cared about the world like I did; who were free, who were happy, and who also loved food and the earth. I returned to Chicago changed, and that was that – I applied to Adamah, quit my job, and started as an Adamah fellow in the fall of 2008.
At Adamah I was finally able to connect my love of food (you might call it a “healthy obsession”) with my love of Jewish community. I was finally able to connect how I could work wholly with my body and spirit, and wholly be engaged as a Jew. This was not possible in my work as a musician; I was always choosing Shabbat or concert, and even earlier, youth group or youth orchestra.
After Adamah I chose the path that I had previously thought impossible. I enrolled in culinary school at the Natural Gourmet Institute, the United States’ premiere culinary school focusing on health-supportive food and vegetarian cuisine. Again, I was not forced to choose. I participated in the meat classes, but did not eat – and my grade was never docked. I learned how to open oysters, but did not partake (I heard they were great). And yes, culinary school was everything I hoped it would be and so much more.
Since leaving school I put it time in a few restaurants, but I eventually decided to go out on my own as a natural foods chef service. I decided that my schedule, my freedom and flexibility were much higher priorities for me, not to mention my Jewish identity. I now cook for families, teach cooking classes within the Jewish community – including Hebrew school cooking once a month, and provide nutrition counseling for clients. And finally, I don’t have to choose between my Jewish identity and my professional career. I don’t work on Shabbat. I take off for Chagim. And I don’t have to sacrifice my kashrut for my work. My clients all know that I have eating restrictions (gluten, kashrut…), yet they love my food and love my work so none of it matters. And every day, I wake up and say Modah ani – I am grateful. For my work, for balance, for all of my blessings and for delicious food.
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Elisheva Margulies is a natural foods chef and holistic health counselor based in St. Louis, MO and the owner of Eat with Eli, LLC. A graduate of the Natural Gourmet Institute and Northwestern University, Eli works actively to help people eat more health-supportive food and to kick the margarine addiction within the Jewish community. Please visit www.eatwitheli.com.
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Click here to read more from our “Why I Eat What I Eat” series.
23: Why I Eat What I Eat
There’s an oft repeated one-liner that distills the essence of every major Jewish holiday to “They tried to kill us. We survived. Let’s eat!” While Alef can’t vouch for the accuracy of that assessment (in fact, we’re pretty sure it’s mostly false), there’s no question that eating plays a vital, almost mythical role in Jewish life and tradition. From the ancient laws of Kashrut which govern what and how traditionally observant Jews eat, to the modern manifestations of sustainable food communities, Jews and Food have become as inextricably linked as Latkes and Applesauce (or is it Latkes and Sour Cream?)
For the next few weeks, Alef will feature stories by food fans, foodies, gourmets and gormandizers, alike. Whether it’s explaining the decision to eat pork, or describing life as a personal chef, all of these stories will try to answer the age old question (No, not “What makes kosher salt kosher?“):
“Why do I eat what I eat?”
-Alef
Photo by bingbing, licensed under Creative Commons.
Why I Eat What I Eat
100% Organic, 100% Kosher
Eat With Eli
The Hostess With The Mostess (Hummus)
A Love-Hate Relationship with Food
Eating Israel
One For the Recipe Books
Keeping Kosher?
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